


Crashing Down.

by BornofFlame



Series: Sanders Sides One Shots [22]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Is Gay, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, M/M, Protests, Sad Logic | Logan Sanders, Strangulation, i am proud to say, in an alternate universe where gay marriage gets banned again, scattering ashes around a walmart parking lot, that I wrote the first nico x logan fic, two main characters die
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-14
Updated: 2020-10-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:01:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27003979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BornofFlame/pseuds/BornofFlame
Summary: What if gay marriage was made illegal again?  What if you never got the chance to tell the person that you loved that you loved them?What if they were torn from you?
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Nico Flores, Nico Flores/Thomas Sanders, platonic DRLAMP
Series: Sanders Sides One Shots [22]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1878814
Comments: 13
Kudos: 70





	Crashing Down.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, gay marriage is actually super close to becoming illegal again in the United States, so catch me being killed because people hate me for who I am.  
> This is a very sad story, but it has a happy ending.  
> enjoy.

Virgil can’t breathe. There’s a knee pressing into his neck and as he chokes, the leering face of the man looms over him.

God, he doesn’t want this to be the last thing he sees, but his vision is swimming and the way that stars are dancing in his vision reminds him of Logan…

The darkness wins.

…

Logan is at work when he gets the call.

Logan is twenty five when he loses his best friend at a protest.

Logan is twenty five when the world comes crashing down.

It had been something that Virgil had offhandedly brought up that morning, when the two were in bed, using each other as radiators so that they didn’t have to pay for heating. A protest that someone had organized that was directly fighting against the ban on gay marriage that had been reinstated after only being legal for five years. He understood where the anger came from and he promised to meet Virgil there after work.

It never happened.

Instead Logan was asked to identify a body in a morgue. Virgil looked like shit as a dead man, the dark circles under his eyes matching in a horrible way with the strangulation marks on his neck.

He didn’t cry. Not until he was knocking on his brother’s door, falling into the arms of Patton and sobbing as his older brother easily lifted him and carried him to the couch. Logan lets himself be hugged, even if it isn’t what he wants, it’s what he needs in the moment, someone to hug him and whisper lies that everything will be okay.

But it’s not. Patton can’t marry his husband, (they were married but it was nullified after gay marriage was banned), and Logan is alone.

Gosh, it’s only been seven hours and he misses Virgil more than anything. Roman came in sometime during the crying fest and joined the pile, simply giving Logan a knowing look.

The protest wasn’t supposed to get violent. That man wasn’t supposed to try to kill that girl and Virgil wasn’t supposed to push him away, knowing that he was fighting a losing battle.

According to the people that managed to pull the guy off of Virgil, his best friend’s last words were along the lines of telling the dude to fuck himself with a hot iron.

It’s fitting.

…

Would it be lying to say that it snowed the day of the funeral? Janus looked up at the sleet that was coming down, tilting his umbrella back just enough to catch some in his face.

His brother had always wanted to be cremated and then scattered in a Walmart parking lot at the witching hour, and so here they are at three am, scattering ashes like how Virgil wanted. Twins were weird that way. Janus never felt like they were related, but Virgil had always loved the strange and obscure, almost the exact opposite of himself.

Logan hasn’t said a word for a week and it scares Janus. He knew that the pair were close, but this was concerning.

The ashes blend well with the sleet, disappearing as each take a turn to scatter some. Janus saved the last bit, and the others pretended not to notice.

…

Patton finds the journal when they’re cleaning out the small apartment that Logan used to share with Virgil.

It’s tucked under the floorboards, it’s really a miracle that he stumbled on it and when he opens it, he can see Virgil’s beautiful cursive filling every page.

Who knew the emo could write so pretty? The journal itself is not that old, the first date from less than six months ago. Each page has a snippet from his life and it’s the words on the last page that prompt Patton to fresh tears.

_ I think I’ll tell Logan tomorrow. Ask him if maybe… after all this is over, maybe he’ll go out on a date with me? _

The entry was three days before he died.

Patton doesn’t show Logan the journal when his brother comes back into the room to carry out a box. The timing isn’t right and Logan is still fragile, barely eating, barely speaking.

…

Roman sat across from the man who did it, the man who’s now in cuffs, blank stare boring into his soul.

“Why?”  
“He was in the way.”

Roman refrains from showing any emotion, although if there wasn’t a pane of glass between them, he’d beat the man until he was black and blue for what he did.

“Do you regret it.”

“Yes.”

“But not for the reasons you should.”

…

It’s Remus who finds Logan one night. Both of them are on the wrong side of the bridge railing, tempting fate.

“I miss him.” Logan admits softly. Remus doesn’t blame him. It’s been three months since the funeral and so much has changed. Roman and Patton are married again, Janus disappeared to Italy and has yet to send out another text confirming if he’s alive and Remus?

He finds Logan. He takes Logan home and helps him eat, helps him stay alive as the world tunnels for the nerd.

He misses Virgil.

But he moves on. Remus doesn’t dwell on things for long, it’s part of the reason why Virgil called him heartless as a joke. It rings false, they both knew it.

Logan was his first friend. They had met in high school, back before Virgil was in the picture. Logan had found Remus on a bridge like this. He’d sat down and coaxed Remus back over the right edge, concern lacing his voice as he talked him through his intrusive thoughts. Logan had later met Virgil and the three became unstoppable senior year of high school.

Remus knows that Logan misses that feeling.

Because he does too.

…

Logan is under his covers when the package arrives, addressed to him in flowing cursive.

It’s Virgil’s handwriting, he’s seen it enough times on the grocery lists that they put together.

It’s a simple bracelet.

Logan didn’t realize that it was Valentine’s day until almost a week later, when he went to the post office to mail a letter and the mailperson processing the letter asked if he got the package okay.

Apparently Virgil had set up the package almost a year in advance, hoping to have forgotten by the time Valentine’s rolled around so his friend could have a surprise.

Logan went home and sobbed for an hour after.

…

Janus returns, a new scar cutting across his cheek and a tattoo on the back of his neck that is a simple padlock with a lightning bolt on it.

He brings with him a delicate glass blown pendant. The glass was mixed with the leftover of Virgil’s ashes and he gave it to Logan.

It rests against Logan’s heartbeat and he pretends to be okay even though everything is crashing down.

…

Virgil’s murderer is released from prison. He later kills another gay man at a protest and is given the death penalty.

It’s too merciful. 

…

Logan turns twenty six. He doesn’t celebrate.

…

Patton gives Logan the journal one day, on a whim when Logan asks if he can help with cooking the anniversary dinner for when Roman and Patton got remarried.

…

Logan is twenty seven when he meets Nico in a mall. They ran into each other- literally and at a later time, he finds out that Nico lost someone too.

Virgil and Thomas.

It’s strange how you lose the ones you love the most.

Together, they pick up the broken pieces and struggle forward.

…

Logan is thirty when he becomes Logan Flores.

Later, after the wedding reception, he’ll hold his husband close and promise, no, vow to always be there for him.

They fall asleep tangled together and everything seems to click back into place. For Logan, he still feels like a vase that's been shattered at a teenager's party, but he's slowing fixing himself, slowly getting better.

…

Sometimes you lose your first love.

Sometimes it snows and you think of them. 

Sometimes you pretend that it's okay.

Sometimes everything comes crashing down.

Sometimes it gets fixed.

This is one of those times.

**Author's Note:**

> please give kudos and comments, they're probably the only thing keeping me alive right now.


End file.
